An incident with a neighbour has compelled me to write about anger. We're all human, and we're allowed to get angry. As human beings we are capable of so many different emotions, and while I prefer that some be rare, I think we should feel all these emotions from time to time, if for no other reason than to remind us that we're all human and we're not perfect.
Sometimes life just really sucks, I know this all too well. Shitty, horrible things happen. It sucks, it reallllly freaking sucks!! It's ok to get angry when horrible things happen, it doesn't mean you're not a good person, it doesn't mean you're not a positive person. It's how you handle that anger that makes a difference. Go into your house or into the middle of nowhere to yell and scream at the top of your lungs, swear up a storm.....but not TO someone, just do it, to nothing but empty space. Punch an inanimate object if you must, though it might be wise to make it something soft. But DON'T EVER, EVER, EVER let your anger cause you to take actions that could put the safety of others in jeopardy. It's not ok, period! You owe your fellow human beings more respect than that. And if you have let your anger take you where it shouldn't, do the right thing. Act like a grown-up and take responsibility for your actions. Don't follow up your lapse in judgement with more anger towards innocent parties when confronted about your actions.
There are many ways to help control anger. The best in my opinion, get GOOD counseling. But there are so many other ways to help maintain happiness and positivity, which in turn makes anger a whole lot easier to control and can be used in conjunction with counseling:
Meditate and pray. Prayer and Meditation are not exclusive to any one religion, faith, or type of spirituality, and they are both so beneficial to us all. Do it on your own, join a group, or even load up one of many guided YouTube videos.
Smudge, smudge, smudge. Smudge your space, but most important, smudge yourself or have someone smudge you(making sure not to smudge the palms of your hands or soles of your feet). A good smudging with sage does wonders, and if you're really struggling with anger and negativity, do it often.
Essential Oils. There are several essential oils that can aid with anger issues. Ylang Ylang, Patchouli, Lavender, Bergamot, and Frankincense are just a few of the many.
Carry Crystals. Selenite and Black Tourmaline are my 2 absolute must-have crystals that I recommend for everyone. It is such a powerful combination for promoting positivity and warding off negativity that everyone should have a piece of each. Other great crystals for anger include(but are not limited to) Amethyst, Fancy Jasper, Blue Lace Agate, and Rose Quartz. Meditate with them, carry them on you, find one in a worry stone....the action of rubbing your thumb on the smooth indent of a worry stone does wonders for all sorts of negative emotions.
These are the easiest, in my opinion, but far from a complete list of ways to help control anger. You owe it to your family, and you owe it to yourself to learn to handle your anger the best way you can.
You may think by that title that this post is going to be about opening the new store. Well, not exactly.
Since we simplified life and narrowed our focus to our interest in Spiritual amazing things keep happening. We've always been into "New Age"(we all know how ridiculous and erroneous that label is!), in fact when my husband and I started dating more than 25 years ago in High School he was already into things like Numerology, he had books by Aleister Crowley and other books on Magick, he had a Spirit Bag that went everywhere he did.....as many times as we've rid ourselves of a lot of our possessions over the years he still has all these things. At the time I knew nothing about any of it, I wasn't Religious or Spiritual, I was pretty sure I believed in God but never really gave it any thought, I was just a teenager at the time and it wasn't something that had ever crossed my path quite enough for me to think about one way or another. For him it was always there, for me it was a gradual thing that life made me aware I not only needed in my life, but was far more sensitive to than I ever knew. I was too busy raising a family to do more than just have a passing interest in it for a long time, but as my kids got older and "needed" me less and less I was finally able to think about who and what I was, start figuring out what I was meant to do(besides being a wife and mother of course :) ).
Since I stopped just dipping my toes and truly dove into the world of Spiritual a handful of years ago my interest has only kept growing, like a hunger I never knew was there. By simplifying life, blockages start clearing and the hunger for learning more just keeps growing. I knew I always had a knack for being a good judge of people who weren't what you would classify as "good", I could somehow sense things about them. My husband used to joke that he should listen to me when I get a bad feeling about people. The more we paid attention to it though the more it wasn't a joke anymore, if we ignored my gut about someone and let them "in" we paid for it in one way or another, leading us to prefer to be without friends than to be hurt by yet another person claiming to be a "friend". I was a stay at home Mom homeschooling my kids while my husband worked long hours, I was lonely and felt I needed friends, any friends to fill the loneliness I had because of my husband working a lot and my day consisting of fighting with my boys to do their schoolwork. But I have also suffered from Social Anxiety, which once I learned what it was I realized I've pretty much had most of my life. So my fear of being in Social situations and around people, but my desperation for friendship caused me to ignore my gut and "take what I could get" I guess you could say. While I do still suffer from Social Anxiety(as does my husband now), fortunately I have grown out of my desperation for friends(by growing my own self confidence), and we have learned to listen to my gut.
We have learned soooo much, we have grown soooo much. But NEVER listen to anyone in this "New Age"/Spiritual/Holistic/Whatever name you wish to give it way of life that claims to know it all. It's simply not true and not possible. No matter how much you know, there is always more learn. One of the biggest things we have learned is that the more we learn, the more we want to learn. And the more we learn, the more we clear blockages and open up and amazing things happen. I think I used to have so much fear of "things" that I was just creating more blockages. As my fear is slowly subsiding I'm allowing things to happen, they're not scaring me, but nonetheless leaving me wowed when they happen.
A couple of weeks ago we were going to meet Paul, the landlord of the space we wanted to rent, he would be there and was having people there working on repairing a leak in the roof. That morning while in the shower and "day dreaming" all of a sudden I had this vision of my husband and I walking into the space. As soon as we walked in there was a man there working and we told him we were there to meet with Paul, to which the man responded "Well, I'm Paul, but not the Paul you're looking for. He's back there.". And that was the end of my vision. A couple of hours later we went to the building for our meeting, we walked in and there was a man there working, we told him we were there to meet with Paul, the man said "I'm Paul, but not the Paul you're looking for. He's back there.". I tried not to react as my nerves were already a wreck thanks to anxiety and having to meet with someone. I didn't even tell my husband until later because I couldn't quite figure out what to make of it. When I told my husband about it that evening he was not as shocked as I had been, his response was that of course stuff like that is going to happen because I'm already sensitive and now I'm allowing myself to open up.
I've had deja vu plenty of times, this was not deja vu though, this was exactly what I saw happening just a couple of hours before it actually happened. I'm still in a little bit of shock that it happened, but at the same time trying to accept that as I allow myself to open up even more it could happen a lot more.